Hi I am driver Jagannath and I drive master Ravi’s Swift. He is a good man this master Ravi but he doesn’t know a thing about driving and I wish he would simply stay out of it. Instead he tries backseat driving all the time.
Take his ridiculous idea about speed for instance. He insists that I restrict to driving at 60 kms per hour. On the Highway ? Come on if you drive at less than 100 kms per hour it is a sign of disrespect to the highway as well as its builders. I am of the firm opinion that even in the narrow bylanes of Ghatkopar which we traverse everyday, anything less than 100 kms is an insult to the car, the roads and the engineers who conceived these narrow bylanes. When I express my views to master, Ravi he wonders as to where I got my licence from. Come on, I got it from the RTO. Also, although I am not much of a reading man I have heard of someone called James Bond and his 007 licence. Now 007 gives a man the licence to kill. Once you have a legitimate driving licence, in my opinion it is really up to the population (pedestrians) to take care of themselves. Did James Bond ever hesitate while using his licence? Why should I?
Take master Ravi’s other silly idea. Don’t get into confrontations on the road, he says. Remember to not get into silly arguments with BEST buses, the huge Volvo tourist vehicles and myriad lorries who simply get in the way of a man discharging his fundamental responsibilities on the road. Come on I know better. I have driven tourist vehicles in my earlier jobs and let me tell you that they didn’t win all the arguments. Yes the Swift may occasionally get a few scratches and even get smashed up. These are occupational hazards. Anyway, he has insurance. These cowards—how do they get to own cars in the first place. On top of that the guy doesn’t pay me properly. And he expects me to be on call. Oh God, he is calling me again. I will have to stop now folks and will update you later.
Post Script: This is master Ravi here although I have personally considered myself to be nothing more than a slave to Jagannath’s driving. I called Jagannath to inform him that after considering various options like buying hefty term insurance, I have decided to sack him. Thanks to that, I hope to celebrate my next birthday.
